It snowed last night, so I took the bus into work thinking that it wouldn't last long enough to justify staying at home. Most of us made it in and getting home wasn't much of a drag either, as downtown was clear and only after you got out into the neighborhoods were there any problems. I saw a couple of cars had gone off the road as my bus decended Beacon Hill. Man, that must've been scary!
If I was one of those people who tried to look for meaning in every event, I'd be scratching my head over this one. The Last Day of The Year. Good riddence. 2003 had some highlights, but sucky-ness ruled this time.
I had breakfast with my lovely ex Mercedes on Monday. She said: "I have two things I want for you next year. 1) Get out more! 2) Stop working nights!!"
I think I agree. There comes a time when a man has to stop accepting the status quo and shake things up. Never before has my place in this world been called into question as much as it was this year. By that, I mean my feelings towards my country and my attitude towards it. I viewed cynicism as the refuge of the unimaginative and the lazy, but goddamn, I sure understand it now.
Nonetheless, I go on. I think the key is to be more pro-active and less re-active, one can still practice 'no mind' and get some bidness done...right?


Anyway, the plan for NYE is to head to Stu's around 4. Tess is supposed to join us for a little pre-functioning before we head off the CHAC for the festivities there.
I'm gonna try not spend too much cash but really, I feel like bein' BAAAAD.

So, maybe I'll see you tonight. Or, if'n I don't-I wish you a Happy and Safe New Year. May it be better than this last one...for real.


Some stuff to think about.

I started here (via Metafilter). Then went here. Then landed here.



Do you remember a time, perhaps when you were 7 or 8 years old -- maybe older (or younger) , and you started to become aware of just how big the world is, and that there are forces out in it that would crush you like a bug if you weren't careful? Or maybe even if you were?
Somehow you got used to it. You told yourself that if I pay my taxes and bills on time, save money, eat right, get an education, exercise, go to church, recycle, see a doctor regularly, brush and floss, regard my parents, work hard, do onto others as I would like done onto me, it'll be alright.
But you're not so sure, are you?


Even though I was raised Jehovah's Witness and am now a declared Agnostic, I still have enjoyed Christmas. I think they meet a basic human need, hope for the new year and disctraction from the drabness of winter.
When my sister and I were kids, the parents sat us down and explained the pagan origins of The Holidays and why JW's didn't celebrate along with the rest of the world. I was pretty cool with it, actually. In third or fourth grade, I was asked to give a short speech about "my beliefs" and I did so happily. But by the time I was in junior high and I had started questioning the things my parents told me, I found the matter a bit embarrassing.
I went my own way around 18 or 19. I didn't feel I had a personal relationship with god. I wasn't convinced that any "religion" had figured out the right path to god AND I wasn't sure that god was necessary for me to be a decent and moral person. But still, Christmas remained.
In my twenties, I made half-assed attempts to celebrate it with friends, since most of my local family are Witnesses, but it felt forced and stupid. And since I wasn't family, I couldn't expect much, even when I went all out with presents. So I dropped it, instead deriving pleasure from the sounds, sights, hustle and bustle of the season. I'd join friends for shopping trips or just wander around downtown, taking it all in. Vicarious-like. That was enough.
But this year seems a little empty. It's like people are going through the motions, meeting obligations and generally not feeling it. Reading the news today is just as depressing as it is on any other, with the ideas of Peace on Earth, Goodwill towards All Men, etc. ringing hollow. I'd be depressed if I didn't feel there were things to look forward to!
However, I am eager to see what 2004 brings...hopefully change of a good, soul-cleansing, head-sorting sort. Maybe we'll get a new and better government. Maybe I'll meet the girl of my dreams or take a nice long road trip on my bike.

I'd like to say thanks to Tab and Maria for stopping by and convincing me to hang out with them yesterday. I was enjoying the quiet, but I haven't seen youse broads in ages and it was all good. Sorry to Ji-Huyn for missing dinner. I somehow got it in my head that it was today! Now I've got more ice-cream than I could ever hope to eat...but that doesn't mean I'm not gonna try!

2004 Ho!!


Weekend Recap:

Stu's party was a hoot. I got there around 10 and walked into a house fulla people. Some folks I hadn't seen in yonks: Alison C., Muz, Casey, Mike W., Marcus and his lovely wife, Tina, Cinnamon and Andy, X-tina, Rob and Annie and Stu's mom and brother. Most everyone bailed by one, so me, Stu, Muz, X-tina and her friend sat around and watched season 1 of The Office (which was my present - Frito gave him Herbie Hancock's new box set). X-tina gave Stu a hilarious lecture on how now that he was a home owner, more women would find him attractive. "'Cause you got EQUITY!" she said. By 4AM most everyone had fallen asleep. I was feeling sober enough to drive so I rode home through empty street to the empty house - Frito's gone for the next 10 days!
On Saturday, there was a Beatles' White Album cover night at the Sunset Tavern in Ballard. Fey Ray was slotted to play "Long Long Long." We got to the bar around 8 after eating dinner at Hattie's Hat. I think we were a bit intimidated by both the crowd and all the other bands there. There were A LOT of ol' skool sceneters in the the place: John Ramburg, Kurt Bloch, Ben London and Scott McCaughey to name a few. We pretty much hid out in the back of the dressing area while we waited our turn. The club was packed! You could'nt even get to the bar without serious effort, so after a few beers we decided to chill. Everyone was in a good mood, the musicians and their friends were all cheering each other on or discussing their instruments. Hannah Levin from The Stranger was the MC and she was hanging around back, looking sexy in a 60's style dress and go-go boots. At one point a gorgeous raven-haired young lady sat next to me to talk to a friend of hers. He went to get them some beers and she introduced herself to me as "Jesse." She asked if I was playing and I said yes and introduced her to all the guys. Then she wanted to know if we were from around Seattle. I told her yes, that we'd been playing gigs for the last couple of years but we'd just spent the last six months working on our album. She seemed somewhat befuddled that she'd never heard of us before.
"We're not really scenesters," I said. "We don't drink at The Cha Cha." Turned out I was talking to Jessie Sykes!! Had I known, I would've been gushing all over her-so it's probably good that I'd only heard her music up to that point.
The performances were pretty cool. Most bands did fairly straight covers or rocked out. Sanford Arms' "While My Guitar Gently Weeps" kicked ass, as did Jake London's "I'm So Tired" and Paul Hiraga's (from Downpilot) "Julia" was cool. I thought the most interesting cover was "Blackbird" done with trumpet and bass in a Miles Davis style.
We finally got on around 1AM and nailed it! I didn't allow myself to get nervous and the fellas were quietly confident, which helped 'cause we feed off each other's energy. It was over so fast, I barely remember it! We got mad props as we came offstage and hell, if Kurt Bloch liked it, it's good enough for me! I bailed during "Revolution 9" and rode home. HAPPY!!


And we're back. My machine went tits up awhile back, so I used Frito's. But his is all shiny and hi-techy with a big window innit so's you can watch the fans spin and whatever.
I had to get my baby back up and running. So Frito and I were running 'round the Southland (Tukwila) last Saturday and stopped in at ComputerSonics and I purchased an Athlon 2800+, heatsink, fan and 512 RAM. Frito bought me a mobo as an X-mas present and to thank me for watchin' the dog. (aww, shucks!)
It took a little futzin' but we got Pally up and stable and she's workin' jest fine!
Then I got sick.
By Monday I recovered and now all is well.
El Stu's birthday is tomorrow...the geezer is gonna be 38!


This is just poor. While not illegal, they certainly aren't telling folks about it. Watch yr ass...(via allaboutgeorge.com)


Like Matt, I was eagerly anticipating the Battlestar Galactica miniseries on The SciFi Channel. I remember eagerly waiting to see the original (much the 'rents consternation) back in the 70's. But even then, I hated all the cheesiness and similarities to Star Wars (UN-like Matt, a series that doesn't really turn my crank). I like lots of layers (DS9 was my favorite Trek, y'know.)
Suffering through Galactica 1980 was even worse and I could totally understand why the series failed.
I've watched both movies twice now (Thanks Replay TV), reading the posts on Metafilter and Slashdot and all the nitpicky comments tangents. But I daresay it the BG miniseries eclispes the original in every way. (SPOILER ALERT):

Starbuck as a woman? Big deal. I thought Katee Sackoff did a really good job. She wasn't too macho, and definitely showed some depth with what she had to work with.
Edward Olmos as Adama. Badass. 'nuff said.
Apollo? I thought the conflict between he and his father was a little cheesy. And Jamie Bamber acted like he had a stick up his bum. But later, when he see The President standing her ground against his father, he starts to loosen up. If the series developed, that would be a great storyline to develop.
Boomer? I could take or leave. If she doesn't know she's a Cylon, I wonder if she'd accept it?
Laura Roslin (The President of the Colonies), superb job, tough, pragmatic and compassionate.
I thought the plot with Baltar and Number 6 was well done. A lot of the yobs on the boards thought the sex scenes were gratuitous. Duh. I never thought I'd hear geeks complaining about sex...life gets weirder every day. Next they'll complain about Madeline Stowe going topless too much!

The space battle scenes were some of the best I've seen. I was really psyched to see missles used as much as lasers, and using manuvering jets on fighters in space combat was a brilliant idea. This was the best space combat show since Space: Above and Beyond.
I hope they make it a series of movies, or at least do some well-plotted story arcs.

Damn cool.
Today is Dan The Man's birthday. I'm trying to decide if I should stay in town tonight and give him my tradition gift - a bottle of Maker's Mark (yick!) or go hang out in B-Town with the gang. Anyway, I thought it would be fun to post another picture...


I've known her for years, and still manage to maintain a crush through all of it. She seems happy, though she's working her ass off (Jeez, don't work that hard - I like yr ass!) and although we don't see each other as much, I wanted her to know that I was thinking of her today.



Man, didjaya'll miss a good time last night! I spent most of it in a booth with a lovely on each arm, but hey-the tunes were slammin', the dancefloor was packed and it looked like everyone was having funfunfun!

Now it's back to work...and rest.


So, the guitar toss was cool. I went to visit my mother and then went down to Stu's place. We got to the Sunset around 7:30 and there was plenty of grub left. I had a pork sammich, cole slaw and three slices of brisket. The BBQ sauce was Frito's Calrolina Style, which I think he's finally perfected. Later, on I walked up to Jake and said, "Dayum, that was some good shit!"
I think he was pleased.
Stu and I stayed for about an hour, chatting with Laurie and her friend, then we bailed and went to Graceland to see Heather Duby, The Swords Project , SushiRobo and The Dirtmitts.
Neil joined us as did Trish and Tracy. We stayed for all but Ms. Duby and Stu, the girls and I went to The Hurricane for some grub. I got home around 3AM.
Last night, my friend Tracy and I met up with some of my friends from the Westsiiide at the Pink Door. We were surprised to find that it was Burlesque night! WHOO HOO!!


I was wondering how long it would be until the Ol' Thug raised his ugly head. Jeez, this isn't even remotely funny anymore. More here.


She did it AGAIN!!

My Mother (who is notorious for withholding information) is in the hospital recovering from a surgery that she somehow forgot to mention when I talked to her at length last week. I called her yesterday to 'check in' and she casually drops it on me. Thanks. Grrrrrr.

(My aunt just called. Mom's doing fine. I'll drop by tomorrow and give her a hard time...as usual.)


Sun|Tzu Presents: Bugz in the Attic!!

West London is home to the broken beat scene, where DJ's, producers and musicians collaborate to produce music that I can only describe as the collision of dub, bossa nova, funk, house, jazz and hip-hop. This shit is complex and nuanced. What's even better is that you can work up a sweat on dance floor or enjoy ya drink and nod ya head...it's all good. Seattle has been sleeping on this stuff for quite awhile, but the Sun|Tzu crew has been constantly bringin' it, week after week at The Baltic Room, putting on some great shows and bringing some truly world-class talent to our little burg. NEXT SUNDAY, DECEMBER 7th, they're doing it again, bringing BUGZ IN THE ATTIC to Seattle.
Along with Kyoto Jazz Massive and the mighty Jazzanova, Bugz in the Attic represent the best of the genre.
I don't work for these people, but I do know a good booty-shakin' time when I see one, so I will be there.

I suggest you be there, too.
At work, we sometimes listen to The Daily Show clips they put up on their website. I was looking around for stuff to play by the late, great Bill Hicks and landed here. There's not a lot of his material here I haven't heard before, but you should check it out!

BTW-Comments are working, thanks to Blogspeak. They rule.


Gotta Email from Jake:


Just a quick heads up to remind you about the 3rd annual Guitar Toss at the
Sunset Tavern. As in years past, it's a benefit for the Boomtown Cafe in Pioneer Square. We've got a great lineup of folks joining us. The list is below. I hope you can make this the official start of your holiday party season.
Please note the following important info too:

*The event is on Friday night this year (December 5th).

* The event starts early this year, during the 6 O'clock Soft Rock Happy Hour Slot. So the doors will open around 6:30 and we'll get the music going around 7pm. From there, the event continue it all night long.

* As an inducement to get you out here early, my good buddy Scott Balikian and the rest of the folks at BlueDisguise Records are graciously assisting us in providing a HAPPY HOUR BARBECUE BUFFET (while quantities last).

That's right, Scott (AKA Frito) and I will be cooking up a large batch of Pork Shoulder, Brisket, and a very special veggie Sloppy Joe for your enjoyment. I expect we may have some slaw and a few cookies hanging around too (courtesy of Kelli Ramberg). So plan to arrive early and stay all night long.

Hosts: John Ramberg and Jake London

Guests: Robb Benson, Braden Blake, Larry Barrett, Mia Boyle, Earl Brooks, Christy McWilson, Jeff Fielder, Michael Hill, Paul Hiraga, Phil Hurley, Jon Hyde, Jared Clifton, Jennifer Potter and Chris Cline, Grant Johnson, Kwab Copeland, Ben London, Steve Mack, Andrew Mckeag, Rick Miller, Ron Nine, The Graze, Fred Speakman, Britt Speakman, Kurt Bloch, Scott Sutherland, Marc Olsen, Steve Turner, Jesse Sykes and Phil Wandscher, Mike Katell, Rusty Willoughby, Sheryl Wiser, Mark Pickerel, and Jen Wood.


Strike Me Down
Reindeer Section
I'd always thought of someone else, before I only think of you. I could always take the years away, before I struggle with it, can't you see I have no choice, other than to leave you, All these years i've lost my voice, shouting over nothing, It never would be easy to hear babe, but you have nothing to fear babe, just think of all the things that i've done to you, and anytime you want to be bad girl,(ba ba ba ba ba ba) I haven't noticed much has changed, drinking everyday now, I used to hope the phone would ring, and now I'm glad it doesn't. Loving someones hard enough, but leaving them is torture, don't think I don't think of you now, i'm with you everyday dear. Never would be easy to hear babe, but you have nothing to fear babe, just think of all the things that i've done to you, anytime you want to be bad girl. (ba ba ba ba ba ba x3)

If you think that one's for you, you're probably right.


Orphan's Thanksgiving was a blast, though it wore me out! On Thursday, Frito and I cleaned and did some shopping. I finally crashed for awhile in the late afternoon and got up to find Scott making Kufta, which we ate while watching wrasslin'. I puttered around some more until I finally went to bed around 3AM, getting up at 6 to get the turkey on.
The plan was to smoke it, which we guessed would take about 9-12 hours. We had to keep the temperature between 200 and 250 degrees. We took turns watching Scott's digital thermometer and since we weren't using direct heat, it took a lot a fuel! We went through almost two big bags of charcoal.
Around noon I made the garlic mashed potatoes, I peeled 10 pounds worth! I added about five bulbs of garlic, ricotta cheese, butter, onion salt, kosher salt and fresh parsley.
Then I peeled and boiled some sweet potatoes (Scott wanted 'em...?) and added salt, butter, cinnamon, brown sugar, allspice, maple syrup and nutmeg. Since I never measure anything I can't pass on any recipes, but they both turned out great!
Laurie was the first to arrive, she brought bread and Maria showed up with antipasta and Frangos! (This is sad-btw)...I was good and crocked by then, thanks to the bloody mary and screwdrivers I'd made myself and Frito. Aaron and Oani showed up and Aaron tried to get me to play Halo and Crimson Skies, but I was too busy trying to stay upright!
Finally, the turkey was ready and I was told I was nominated to carve it. Great. I hacked at it and got about three plates of meat off it.
The meat was differently colored than oven-baked, but it had a salty-smoky flavor that was wonderful! I got a mess of my potatoes, cranberry sauce and some of Frito's apple-cornbread stuffing and parked on a couch. I got totally stuffed and wanted to crawl into bed but I stayed up and had some beers. I was totally wiped when Stu left around 2 (I think). Clean up went pretty smoothly and I spent the rest of Saturday sleeping...and eating leftovers.

On Sunday, The Chadster and I headed downtown. We had dinner at the Alibi Room then walked over to catch Norwegian black metallers Dimmu Borgir. Opening the show was Nevermore, Children of Bodom, and Hypocrisy. Hypocrisy was on first and I was not impressed...what did blow me away was the Showbox was fuggin' PACKED. I think I was the only person not wearing black (slaps forhead, wails "What was I thinking?!!") All night, this one guy kept bugging Chad and me, wanting us to boost him into the air during Dimmu's set...we tried to humor him but he kept going on and on about it!
Anyway, Hypocrisy...then only thing memorable about their set was the synchronized head banging. Which made me chuckle. Honest, I hadn't seen that since like, 1985! Fortunately, they weren't on long.
Chad told me that he'd downloaded some Children of Bodom and wasn't expecting much, but they came out and kicked ass! Gritty and Melodic, they were easily the most impressive band of the night, even more so when I found out that they're from Finland!
Nevermore bored me and I wanted to smack their smug singer upside the head. I'd seen them years ago when they were starting out during the grunge years. By the time Dimmu Borgir came on, I'd had enough, though I was impressed with Nick Carter's masterful drumming. The guy who wanted us to launch him disappeared sometime after COB set, I didn't see him again all night...weird. I guess "metal" is back!

You heard it here -- first!


I got a Question/As serious as Cancer

No, it's not about keepin' the dancers hyper.

See, I have this friend, who is sweet, smart, funny and cute. But she has a tendency to get date men who, in the end, are not worth her time and love.
She and I are quite close and have been for some time. So naturally, we talk about these things. Although I've noticed that when we talk, it goes something like this:

Her: "Well, he did it again.
Me: "Really?"
Her: (Launches into a long and detailed story about how boyfriend messed up)
Me (somehow incredulous): "Why do you let him do this to you?"
Her: "I know. (Then makes some excuse for boyfriend's gauche behavior)"
Me: (Gives advice that I know won't be heeded)
Her: (Agrees with advice -still seeks not to make him look so bad)

Lately, I feel myself pulling out of the relationship because I now that I see the is pattern set, and wish to free myself from things that drain my energy and peace of mind.

So what's the best way to do this?

Usually, I'm quite blunt. I could tell her that her problems with her man are verboten where she and I are concerned. But then we somehow end up on the subject anyway. I'm bored with it, frankly. I've hung out with him on a few occasions and I don't think we'll ever be friends.



I'm cleaning house and rocking out to the stereo...or I was, until I came downstairs for this. Frito is making Kufta and Salad tonight and we're doing some prep for the big day tomorrow.
I'm making garlic mashed potatoes.

For those of you who took some time off from stuffing yr face and/or hanging with Mom and Dad or the In-Laws, thanks for checking in and HAPPY TURKEY DAY!!

OK, then. Back to wharf.


First and Last...Cuz Oani Diddit.

First job: Real job? Like with paychecks n shit? I made lunches for underpriviledged kids (GA).
First screen name: Black8
First self-purchased album: Um. I think it was Devo's "New Traditionalists" or The Clash's "Combat Rock".
First funeral: A second cousin who'd drowned.
First piercing/tattoo: N/A
First credit card: Bon Marche
First true love: "True Love??! Whazzat?"
First enemy: Ronald Fuckin' Regan...bigtime.
First big trip: 1970 to visit the folks "down home."
First concert: Mom took me to see The Commodores at The Seattle Center Coliseum...it was bitchin'.
First musician you remember hearing in your house: Ennio Morricone...really!
Last big car ride: That would've been the Gentlemen's Bible Study & Retreat near Mt. Rainier last summer.
Last kiss: I think is was Maria. Or Louise's dog Noey...
Last library book: ?! I haven't set foot in a library in yonks. I either buy or look it up online.
Last movie seen: A Mighty Wind...
Last beverage drank: Glass of Milk
Last food consumed: Cheese Danish
Last phone call: Mi Mater. What? What?!
Last cd played: Geez, that's like askin' me about the last time I breathed! I think it was Jazznova: Remixed.
Last annoyance: Whiskey Maldonado.
Last soda drank: Coke. Sunday night.
Last ice cream eaten: Green Tea Ice Cream at Ji-Huyn's
Last time scolded: I'm sure Laurie will sometime soon.
Last shirt worn: Black Polo shirt.
Last Web site visited: www.allmusic.com
The day Everything Became Nothing

The day everything became nothing, I was standing underneath a streetlight, wishing I had a cigarette. I can't recall anything unusual about it. If there was something in the air, if the skies had clouded over, I wasn't aware, I was too bored to care. No thunder roared. No lightning cracked. No missiles rained from the sky. Thiswas no sneak attack. There was just suddenly this awful lack. Things had changed, that's for sure.
The day everything became nothing, you couldn't put your finger on what had gone wrong. The alleys were still dirty; the garbage still smelled; there was no panic in the streets; just a lot of grief--in people's faces, in their eyes--a mixture of horror and total surprise. This was no apocalypse. No one heard a voice from the sky, there were no miracles at the 7-Eleven, no one screamed, no one even asked why.
It was just like everything had somehow, quietly died. So let it die!
I can't recall much of what happened next. I was on my way to visit this woman I knew. All we had in common was good sex, and now I couldn't even remember her address. A group of us, just strangers, got together and we formed a committee to discuss the problem. We talked about things like assured mutual destruction and emotional responsibility. I couldn't remember my name, so I called myself Bob.
It's weird being a Bob, but I'll get used to it.
I have to.


Mr. Yacub is at it AGAIN!! This time he's cloned Layne Staley and Curt Cobain, fused the two, stripped the unholy beast of actual songwriting talent and forced it front some crappy rock band called Puddle of Mudd!! (crappy single on autoplay-watch yrselfs!!)

Evil, Evil Mr. Yacub!!!
Work was a hoot! I got warm a couple of times and thought I was gonna relapse, 'cause it wasn't the usual 4AM "dead spot" when the AC turns off for awhile
(We usually raise our desks and work standing up then).
Due to all the sleep I got, I've actually been up for over 24 hours now and I feel fiiiiiiinnnnne!! Nah, I'm loopy, it's just manifesting itself differently. One of my co-workers has a cold and every time she blew her nose, I'd chuckle. Then I started critiquing the sound. Fortunately, she was amused too. (You'd be surprised at what you'll laugh at in the wee hours of the morning!) Besides, snot is funny...
I debated with myself all the way home about stopping at Mickey D's for breakfast, but decided to pass. I don't have much food in the house so I don't know what I'm holding out for! And guess what? I'm freakin' hungry!
BTW -- A big up to Juli and Mercy for offering to check in on me whilst I was laid up. You ladiez rule.

Whisk-DumbAss is driving me crazy! He follows me everywhere. Almost tripping me every time I go up the stairs. Scrambling after me as I go down them.
As I type this he's under the desk. You'd think I had a slab of bacon tied around my neck...
And he'd not just content with being near me, oh no -- he's gotta be touching me, poking me in the arm for attention with his cold nose or laying his head on my foot or burrowing behind my legs as I chill on the futon watching the fitba (Chelsea v Southampton).
Despite this, we've gotten along OK, although yesterday he waited until I got on the phone and then started whining and pacing back and forth - like a neglected girlfriend! He didn't want to be let out and he'd eaten already. So I finally bonked him (gently) over the head with empty donut box and he settled down after that. Frito gets back this afternoon. I may be able to restrain myself from killing him until then.

I like dogs...really!


I rode the bus for the first time in ages on Thursday. I overslept and called into work to tell them I was on my way. I got on my clothes and my thermal rainsuit, hopped on my bike and Yoiks! and away. About a mile from the house, it started hailing! I decided it wouldn't be worth the risk, especially if I had to face black ice in the morning, so I turned around and came home. Then I walked the half mile to the bus stop and caught the (infamous) number 7 to downtown.
There were only four of us onboard and poked my nose into my book. The driver called out street names and I thought about the thousands of times I'd made this trip since that first time riding the bus sans parents when I was around 10 or 11 years old. It was 12:30AM and the streets were empty.
Somewhere near the I-90 overpass this fella gets on. An older white dude. He sits up front and launches into conversation with the bus driver:

Man: Hallelujah! Man, that's how they sang it, y'know?
Driver: Uh, huh.
Man: It's like people today...they don't know...they don't understand! It's like Diana Ross and The Supremes when they did it!
Driver: Yeah.
Man: It's holy, It's holy, It's holy.

He then gets off at the next stop.

I got home from work, took the dog to the dog park and laid down for a nap. The plan was to go bowling. Around 6, I woke up feeling warm and rested, but then immediately, I started shivering, which didn't make sense, because I'm usually too warm under my thick, heavy comforter. I got up and put on a long sleeved shirt and kept shivering - violently. Needless to say, I didn't go anywhere this weekend, although I feel fine now. I have an extra-long weekend coming up, plus we're having Orphan's Thanksgiving here at SOUL HEAVEN on Friday. Better to be sick now than later!


Troll-A-Go-Go pix (actually, more Troll-A-Ween -ed.)


I have seen this movie and agree wholeheartly with this review.
So Frito went off to Las Vegas (by way of Detroit) and left me and Whisk-Butt behind. I'm sleepy as heck, but I gotta stay up until the UPS guy arrives with my new video card and hard drive. Then I'll probably stay up for awhile getting my computer up and running again. Scott has been kind enough to let me use his, but I can't save, install or tweak anything and that simply will not do!

I was over at Dong Resin's place and once again he showed his brilliance!

I found this amazing too. On one hand, it shows just how far the neocons are willing to go to achieve their goals. On the other it shows just how complacent and fearful we have become. Ronald Regan, during his re-election bid in 1984 asked, "Are you better off now than your were four years ago?"
With North Korea and possibly Iran making nuclear weapons, bombs going off in Turkey and Saui Arabia, corporations writing legislation and things poised to get even worse in the near future, I gotta ask -- Why would anyone vote for these fools again?

I picked the Avram Davidson Treasury during my last book-buying frenzy (FREN-ZAY!!) and I'm trying to read it as slowly as I can. Davidson wrote most of his stories for the sci-fi and fantasy pulps back in the day, but his economy with words, deft and wide-raging imagination are staggering! Imagine extremely well-crafted "Twilight Zone" episodes written by William Gibson and you get the picture. Yah- It's a poor analogy, so bite me -- It'll have to do for now.

Also, Megan-poo and her friend/nemesis Nate came over for some pizza, champagne and hot-tubbing last night. Man, what a great way to start your "day!" I don't think I've ever been so relaxed rolling into work. Anyway, it was fun and we'll do it again soon...


Freddy Signs with DC United!

14 year-old Freddy Abu signed a 4 year deal (with a extra two year option) with MLS team DC United. This deal makes Freddy both the highest-paid and youngest member in the league. Damn! Can you imagine being 14 and playing pro soccer? With guys like twice yr age? And getting mad cash for it?
In one way the signing is good for United Statesian soccer. I'd love to see the US's game get to the level where the rest of the world would have to take us seriously. I think we should invest in the local talent rather than shipping them off to Europe, only to get them back at the end of their careers. If Freddy's got someone looking out for him and he doesn't pull a Capriati, this could be the beginning of some exiciting times indeedy...
It's raining today. I enjoyed the ride home, despite the additional hazards of riding in the wet. In my helmet and thermal rainsuit, I feel insulated and safe yet vulnerable, knowing what could happen if I hit the brakes too hard, drive too fast or let my attention wander. It's a singular feeling.
I remember last year, before the company moved downtown, the huge rush I got when barreling up the on-ramp to I-90, getting up to speed in the Mt. Baker Tunnel and blasting out onto the I-90 floating bridge. The wind and rain slapped at me as I descended down towards the lake -- a vast pit of black water surrounded by the bright lights of the surrounding neighborhoods. There was usually very little traffic at 10PM. It's about a mile to the other side, the grade getting steeper and curving to the left on the other side . There was a brief reprieve from the weather in the Mercer Tunnel, then I was out into the rain and wind as I crossed Mercer Island. I'd usually be doing about 70mph as I came down the other side of the island. Then another water crossing, much shorter than the first; then up the long grade past Factoria to 139th St. where I'd exit. I always felt the thrill of triumph as I pulled into the garage, feeling like I'd cheated death, the elements and my human frailties once again.
Of course, the ride home had different thrills and risks. Fog, the possibility of black ice, increased traffic and me feeling weird and out of sorts from still trying to get used to working nights...

My good friend and bandmate, Matt and his lovely Leslie are now the proud parents of a healthy baby girl. Miss Ana, I do look forward to making your acquaintance soon. Congrats all around!!

Oh yeah! You can catch the first glimpse of the new Fey Ray album here...it won't be out until February, though...


Marcus thought he would drop some science upon us:

Something to get your day going...

The WSJ reported that fecal material and bacteria can be flung at least 20
feet away from a toilet during flushing. They recommend always washing your
toothbrush in hydrogen peroxide before use. They kind of recommend closing
the lid as well, but there you go.

El Stu thought he'd drop, uh, something else:

Yeah, I heard that. I have to remember to close my mouth when I'm bent down
inspecting the length and girth of my stool. But sometimes my jaw is
hanging open in awe.


I learned a couple of important things this weekend:

1. I can still drink a fifth of Tequila with little to no effect.

2. I really, really like watching rugby on TV.

I took Sunday off from work so's I could catch my post-punk heroes Killing Joke at the Showbox -- but then I decided not to go. I was pretty tired, off my sleep schedule and afraid I was gonna get sick, 'cause so many friends have been felled by colds in the last week.
On Friday, Sheri came over to visit. We watched soccer and drank screwdrivers. She was leaving to interview at a couple of colleges "back east" and wanted to see me before she left. On Saturday, I was feeling a little stir crazy, so I went to visit El Stu. We got caught up and had lunch at Cyclops. Then it was home for a short nap, then out to Gopi's for a party. I spun for little while, mostly for myself -- then Frito took over. FloorM@ was also in the house, as was a female DJ, whose name escapes me...
The party was fun, and everyone was really friendly. Or maybe it was the tequila...Anyway, we all had a a really good time. The best part was coming home at 3AM and eating tomato bisque from Safeway...that's shiz the BOMB, yo!
I got up around 11 on Sunday and motored to the lovely Cafe Flora for a post-event NSC meeting. Then Matt, Seth and I were supposed to have band practice but realized that wasn't going to happen when we found out that my gear was locked in Sean's garage -- and he was out of town.
In addition to all that, I managed to catch a couple of soccer matches and 2003 Rugby World Cup matches (pulling for NZ--they dance real good) and I read from cover to cover Echoes of Earth.

And now I'm off to meet Mercy at Easy Street Records in Wes'Seattle for breakfast...and she's buying!!


Am I Black Enough For Ya?!

I wrote a letter to the editor of Salon the other night after reading an article by Laura Miller on the TV show "Angel". In it Ms. Miller opines:

Plus, can we talk about Gunn, please? News flash, everyone: He's black. Race has never been a subject well tackled by Mutant Enemy, the company that produces both shows, and the mystery is why. Gunn's situation -- a black man who left the community he grew up in and defended with his life to fight the "bigger" good fight with a handful of white folks -- just naturally generates the kind of internal quandaries that make Whedon's characters' travails so fascinating. Doesn't Gunn ever feel a twinge of homesickness, of identity confusion, of racial alienation? The new season's idea of implanting him with a comprehensive knowledge of the law is amusing, but does he have to be such an Oreo?

First of all, some of the issues with "Gunn's situation" were addressed in Season 3 (which was back when I watched the show regular-like). Secondly, OREO?! Excuse me?! It's bad enough that black people have been actively restricted and discouraged from realizing their dreams, indenties and aspirations throughout most of their history in these United States, but now we can even catch shit for not being "black enough!"
I don't what color Ms. Miller is but that doesn't excuse such ignorant, hateful behavior. I've had "Oreo" levelled at me before, usually by white folks who (at best) thought they were being funny and (at worst) were trying to hurt me or thought they knew enough about "what black people do" to be making such charges. What is most offending to me is the idea behind the term -- That my personal influences, interests, likes, dislikes and life experience all mean nothing in the face of my black skin. That all black people are the same, no matter where we came from or what we do -- like we're mass produced in a vat somewhere. Most of my most deeply held beliefs are centered around the power and potential of the individual. Calling someone an Oreo (or conversely, a Wigger) robs that person of the their selfhood, their individuality, their right to self determination and realization by impugning their personhood. By insinuating that they are not being themselves, but rather "acting".
To those who hold such attitudes, I'm (not) sorry, but whatever expectations you have for me in the way I speak, think, look or act are your fucking problem. Not mine.
Even though the discussion at hand was about a fictional character, I was happy to see Ms. Miller get a good blasting in the Letters section. Why a Senior Editor gets to spout off crap like she does (don't even get me started on her ad homium attack on Chuck Palahniuk) is beyond me, but it appears she doesn't have to apologize for being FUCKING WRONG. I guess that either way, Salon gets hits.
And lord knows they could use the attention...


I don't know if it was due to Halloween being on a weekend or some sort of post millenium tension, but it seemed like the whole town was partying!

This year marked the most successful Troll A Ween and Troll A Go Go yet! It's really amazing how we go through considerable stress and strain each year only to pull off one of the best parties in town! We had over 700 in attendence and everyone seemed to be having a great time. I was really impressed with Quasi Nada and Kultur Shock put on a set that was both fierce and funky!

After putting in a 13 hour day at the TAGG and six hours cleaning up, I was too tired to attend the Noche de los Muertos party put on by the Space Virgins, et al on Saturday night. But I did go to Future Soul at the Baltic Room on Sunday night to dig on the cool vibes my bros in the Sun|Tzu collective were throwing down.

I'm going back to work to get some rest...

(To think there was a time that this would've been an 'average' weekend.)


“Honestly, it’s a little tougher than I thought it was going to be,” Lott said. In a sign of frustration, he offered an unorthodox military solution: “If we have to, we just mow the whole place down, see what happens. You’re dealing with insane suicide bombers who are killing our people, and we need to be very aggressive in taking them out.”


Hey there,

Hadda re-reinstall Windows due to some pesky mismatched driver's ability to hang on after reformatting the hard drive.
It was driving me crazy!
I've just about got all the software installed, but I can't find my Photoshop disc! Curses.

Anyway, thought I'd drop this and this on ya. I don't think there's any need for further commentary.


Troll A Go Go News:

Essential Chocolate has generously donated the use of their new home -- the former RedHook Brewery -- to the Fremont Arts Council to hold this year's Troll-A-Go-Go. It's a great space, but still in transition from it's old use as brewery into its future space as a chocolate factory.

And that's why we need your help!

In order to get the space ready for the FAC to use on Halloween night we'll have a work-day on Saturday, October 25th (starting at 11:00 am) to clean-up and "smooth-out" the space.

We need the help of some fabulous Fremonsters to: move out broken-up concrete & building materials; grind off the heads of bolts sticking up from floor; chip away cement "tripping-hazards"; patch holes in floor or cover-over bad flooring; take materials to the dump; mop & sweep up; etc. In general, to tidy the place up and make sure it's safe for all come Halloween.

Anyone who can push a broom or lift a hammer is welcome!
Bring your work gloves and whatever tools you've got and join in the fun!

If you think you can make on
SATURDAY, OCT 25th 11:00 - 4:00
contact: volunteer@newstylecollective.org
and let us know you're coming.

(Free admission to TROLL-A-GO-GO for the first 10 people who join the work-party!)

Some specific tools & talents we'd love a little extra help with include:
- A pick-up truck (for a run to the dump)
- Light carpentry (framing over & closing off a doorway, covering gaps in cement floor)
- Heavy-duty disc sander (metal and/or masonry pads)
- Roto-hammer/drill (or other cement chipping tools)

If you've got talents with any of these or just want to lend a helping hand, contact us ahead of time and we'll try to arrange getting you what you'll need. And if you want to help but can't make it on the 25th, let us know & we'll see what we can work out.



Oy! Went to the FRAUD: Dazzle Camouflage opening last night with Frito. Neil, Stu, Miriam, Dan, Gopi, Louise and others were in the house. We enjoyed the music of Tennis Pro and Rockstar Crush, ran into various friends and scensters and made a couple of new acquaintences. Traci and Trish were bartending and pourin' em stiff-like. Went to a little get-together at a friend's house after a VERY close to 2AM beer run, bad behavior all around.
Shook off the hangover by 2PM and headed to Sean's to put down some backing vox on the Fey Ray album. Lovely Angie from The Stares came in to do the same AND she'll be adding some keyboard later on in the week. Sean means to get the whole thing mixed and off to mastering by the 28th. Crossing fingers!



You haven't written a new blog entry in almost two weeks -- are you okay?
(or are you blogging somewhere else now?)


Just struggling with Torpor and Ennui. I don't have anything new or interesting to say, so I thought I'd not post for awhile...



Frito and I went to our friend Amy's for her birthday party on Saturday night. We thought it'd be kinda cool to walk in with a couple of 40's of OE, so we did! The funny thing was we couldn't get 'em at Safeway or the gas station about a mile from our house, we had to go to 7-11 (oh, thank heaven!)
By the time we got there, the party was well under way, everyone seemed 'happy'. Neil was there, as was Suze and Jill and Tom. I got introduced to Darrell and Patrick, I'd seen both of them on Friendster and was pleased to meet 'em in person.


Mmmm. Sliding deeper into fall. The weather is gray, cool and rainy. We fired up the heater and it's nice and cozy inside. Next I stock up on ingredients for soup, which is my favorite thing when it's cold out. I bought Iron Storm to keep my trigger finger happy until Half-Life 2 comes out next spring.
Otherwise, it's been pretty quiet.
Another announcement via Sun|Tzu Sound System:

SunTzu Sound is launching our new night

/: F U T U R E S O U L :\
which will be happening every Sunday at the



We are celebrating AC Lewis's BIG 3-0! Come down
and give 'em some spankins'!

Check for us earlier in the evening at about 8pm
on Expansions on KEXP with KIDHOPS and then come
down to the club!

This new venture of ours is very close to our
hearts as we try to kick start a music revolution
here in Seattle. I hope you can join in on the

SunTzu Sound presents

/: F U T U R E S O U L :
Broken Beat * Nu Jazz * Deep House * Afro-latin *

LIVE Musicians + Vocalists
performing with the SunTzu Sound DJs


The Baltic Room has welcomed SunTzu Sound back to
its music lovin' dancefloor. We'll be bringing
you the freshest music from West London, Germany,
Japan, Philly, Detroit and beyond every week.
Joining us for the ride will a rotating cast of
percussionists, singers, bass players, MCs and


SUNDAYS at The Baltic Room
9pm - close

$5 all night
Ladies free before 11pm

Email for guestlist: info@suntzusound.com

Read about SunTzu Sound here.

Listen to SunTzu Sound live from San Francisco

Visit Suntzu Sound here.

I'm gonna try and swing by for awhile. But I go into work early on Sunday nights...damn.


So-we're doing it again:

Make your Halloween plans early! Tickets go on sale Monday Oct, 6th for...

The Fremont Arts Council's 2003

an All-Hallows Eve extravaganza, haunted masquerade ball,
& fundraising benefit for the Fremont Arts Council

Halloween night, Friday October 31st
@ the old Brewery Building in Fremont (34th & Phinney)
Tickets $12 adv./ $15 day-of-show 21+ w/ I.D.

Kultur Shock
Quasi Nada
Darek Mazzone (KEXP, Wo-Pop)

with performances by
Troupe Hipnotica
Zaphara's belly-dancers
& much, much more!


Friday October 31st, 9:00pm
@ the old Brewery Building (34th & Phinney)
21+ with I.D.
Tickets: $12 adv. / $15 day-of-show ($20 w/out costume)
Advance tickets available online at: TicketWeb.com

Last year's Troll-a-go-go sold out quickly - advanced tickets are highly recommended!!!

Stayed home Friday. Dan, Louise and Will were here off and on all weekend, sanding the concrete and staining it. I think they'll seal the countertops and install the sideboard sometime this week. I slept off and on all afternoon then stayed up until 5 or so watching TV.
On Saturday I went for a ride and stopped at my favorite Chinese restaurant, The Shanghai Garden for some pan fried meat dumplings and HUGE bowl of hot and sour soup. I laughed out loud when my fortune cookie told me that I was going to receive enlightenment that day.
Later, I met up with Stu and Neil at a cafe in Ballard to catch Neil's sister playing her singer/songwriter stuff. She had an impressive rack of effects pedals and did some cool stuff with loops. Afterwards, we met up with Trish and her friend Traci at Linda's and BS'd. We were joined by various people during the night. Then we walked down to the ChaCha, wheree I met Kimberlee, a woman who messaged me on Friendster just a couple of days before. Neither of us knew we were going to be there.
I went out for an NSC meeting this morning, but I felt pretty crappy. Not drunk crappy, like nauseous, gassy, ugh! crappy. I came home and slept, was interrupted twice when the dog wanted to be let out, then called in sick. I still feel gross. It's 3AM and I'm gonna hit the hay. Frito is supposed to be back sometime today.


Man, I didn't post all week?! That's triflin'. But I've been feeling that way...My energy level is low, nothing's going on and I feel restless and bored, pissed (no, annoyed) about Rush Limbaugh and Wilson/Plamegate and the complacency I see all around me (mine too!). I talked to a couple of friends and they're in a funk as well. Perhaps it's something in the water?
The kitchen should be done by next week (crosses fingers) and perhaps not being interrupted by banging, grinding, sawing, etc. will do much to restore my peace of mind. Dahlings--you must come see it when it's finished!

I called an ex-girlfriend last week, which is really not unusual for me--but when she asked me if it was a booty-call, I had to pause. She's supposed to come over tonight, so I guess we'll figure it out then.
Frito's in MN for a wedding.
Cindy, Kim and Eric all stayed here last weekend and we had a pretty good time. We were all pretty tired Saturday, so Frito BBQ a salmon and I stayed in while the kids went off to play pool.


Ain'tnobodygonnabreakamistride--Ain'tnobodygonnasloowmeedoowin, ohno!

So the weekend is here and I'm feeling kinda feisty. I guess we're going out tonight! There's this new place in Belltown then another new place on Capitol Hill!

Man, that first beer is gonna taste so friggin' good!

Cindy and Kim AND Kim's boyfriend are all in town from Detroit.

And the kitchen remodel is almost done!! The concrete countertops got poured day before yesterday and Dan & Wheezy are here now taking apart the frames. The concrete gets wrapped in plastic, so that it doesn't dry out too fast (and crack) and we have to leave it alone for a month. Then it gets dyed, sealed and a coat of beeswax.

Also, I finally got my computer problems sorta out. Nothing cleans the pipes like a fresh install of WXP!! I've got new sound and video cards in too!


Lost in Translation:

Last weekend, a (female) friend emailed me asking if I'd like to get together. We discussed going to Oktoberfest, but were a little put off at the cost-basically $20 to get in-plus whatever we were gonna spend on beer. Which is pretty crappy considering there's at least a half-dozen places to drink in Fremont. I was pretty psyched to see her regardless.
Also, my friend was bummin' 'cause a guy she was really hoping to go out with blew her off-among a couple of other things. I responded to her with my best Cary Tennis impression:

Ouch. That guy may have been looking for something quick and easy...and you're definitely not quick and easy. Please just blow it off. People accept and reject each other for really superficial reasons and there no rhyme or reason to it all except it leaves one wondering...and that's the hardest part.

I'm sorry to hear you're depressed. Personally, I think you're just lonely and after all that time you focused on career and school, maybe you're wondering why you're not happier. I think you need to go a vacation, away from friends and family, to someplace where they don't speak English. You need an adventure-something to remind yourself of who you are and hopefully discover something new. You should go somewhere you can lie in the sun all day, dance on tables at night and kiss tall, dark, handsome strangers who can't understand a word you say.

A boy (no matter how wonderful) can't do that for you.

Nonetheless, we face a long, cold winter and the only way to make it through is by keeping our hearts warm. Just know that I care for you, even though we're total opposites, even though I feel I don't know you as well as I should after knowing you for seven years and that I often wonder what purpose I serve other than Plan Z guy-you certainly don't invite me around you 'proper' friends-which is too bad-I do know which fork to use for salad. Anyway, I have a hot tub, a fireplace, a sturdy shoulder for crying on, lots of booze, easy access to Pho and my hearing is still pretty good-if you need me, I'm here for you.

I get an email back:


You’ve got the first part partially right and the last part wrong. Let’s not have this conversation via email. If you have issues with me, you know you have to address them face to face or at least via phone. Email is the easy way out. I guess I have to explain myself to you once again, and I’m really not in the mood right now.

HuhnWah?! So I call. I leave three messages throughout the course of the day. I didn't make any plans with anyone else 'cause she'd complained a few months ago that she doesn't like hanging out with me in a group.
(This was after she showed up at a gig unexpectedly-apparently I was too distracted by other people, things, etc. to greet her enthusiastically enough.)
Finally, after a short game of phone tag I get her.

Basically, she'd taken umbrage to my observation that she rarely invited me out with her friends. "I'm sorry, but I don't have that many friends, not like you." She said.
"I have a very few close friends and then there are people I see every once in awhile. And please don't be offended-but you fall into that second group."

"Well, I wasn't complaining. It was an obvservation." I replied.
"It was a perception." She corrected.

I backed down. We'd argued along similar lines before (thus the "explain myself to you again" line) and I didn't want the message that my door was open to her to get lost.

"Besides, I invited you to my graduation party and you had something else to do." She said.

Humph. True. But no mention that I'd stopped by her place with a card a couple of days later.

She informed me that she was going out with some other buddy that night, implying heavily that seeing me would be too exhausting in her current state.

I hung up exasperated...and annoyed. Then angry. I tried to cheer her up and this is what I get?! I wanted to call up back and tell her she was wrong and that it was fucked up and telling that she had nothing nice to say about my offer to be there for her. AND that by placing me in the "People I see every once in awhile" catagory, that all she did was confirm what I'd observed in the first place!
But perhaps it's just best to prune it off the friendship tree...*sigh*

I can hear Stu laughing now: "How is it that you get all of the problems and none of the sex?"


Frito, in an attempt to expand his media empire, has been in touch with Mark Eitzel (really!) and got an email from him today:

Hey - Hope you are all as thrilled as I am by the onset of fall. Sorry to
bother you but American Music Club are playing for free every Monday in
December at Spaceland (see www.markeitzel.com) in Los Angeles.



That would be worth a trip to El Layme, dontcha think?
I was checking out the posts over at George's when I came across an article on "dogging". Jeez. Ya learn something new every day don'tcha? I wonder if the phenom is limited to the UK.


Memory Dump (With an emphasis on the Duh):

Whugh. Sunday already. Time to shift gears again and start thinking of ways to amuse myself, lest I go insane at work. 48 hours in not enough, dammit!

I was out sick Wednesday night. I could feel myself coming down with something and called in. I'd gone to bed at 3PM woken up at 7, when Frito's sister, brother-in-law and nephews came in and again at 10, when I called in. I then racked out again for another 10 hours. I felt tons better although I don't think I was out of the woods until well into the evening. I went to work.
I got home at the usual time and spent the morning playing Freelancer, then my computer prompted me to install some new MS update, after which my computer start blue-screening and giving me driver-conflict errors. I swapped out video cards which worked for awhile, but it started all over again. I still haven't figured it out...I write this on Scott's machine.
I got two hours sleep and then met Tim at the Baltic Room. We had some drinks and then went down to Graceland to see SushiRobo. Their new CD "The Light Fingered Feeling of SushiRobo" is out and they were opening for Kaito and The Walkmen. We talked to Arthur and Julie for a bit, they got hitched a couple of weeks ago and then watched the boys tear shit up onstage.
I haven't had a chance to listen to the disc more than once, but I like what I've heard. Clay and Barry (the rhythm section) seem to be more fully driving things now, setting up the foundation for Dave and Arthur's sci-fi guitars to swoop, ping, ni and fataang-fataang over. If you can imagine all the quirkier parts of Television and Wire thrown together, that's what you got. Live, they seem to be into "rocking" more. I'd talked to Arthur about the record a few months ago and he said it was their best work yet. Right on.
Kaito was cool-kinda punky and loud, but too trebley for me and I needed to go home, check on Whiskey (Scott is in OR) and crash. I walked back up the hill to my bike and rode home.
Saturday, I rode out to the U-District to get some teriyaki and my favorite place and maybe pick up some books or music. There was an NSC meeting at 4:30 (planning this year Troll-A-Go-Go). I had some tentative plans but decided I just needed to chill. So I ordered a pizza and watched TV until 4AM.
I saw a documentary on the band Queen. I've always been deeply suspicious of Brain May due to his clog wearing. Yet he seems to be quite a lovely man.

P.S. My mother is curious about my weblog. Heh, probably wondering what I say about her! I don't think she'll actually bother to look it up-she doesn't have a computer and just told her to Google me if she wanted to find it. But you never know...


Sometimes it takes more than love to get the poison out. Damn.
After two stunning records and split release with The Dismemberment Plan, Juno is calling it quits.

I saw these guys a few times and it was like being caught in a hurricane. So many bands are doing emo now and they all sound the same. Juno stole from Jawbox, but they were at least decent enough to go to one of the sources. I though if there was any local band that could've gone the distance, it would've been them...alas-not to be.


There was a discussion of Magnatune today on Metafilter. Finally! A record label with a clue! I was chuffed to see my friend Suzanne's band, Emma's Mini on the label. Check it out, you can try before you buy and they have a sliding scale for albums!
Things I have learned (part I):

Never trust people who wear clogs, especially men who wear clogs. Nor people who insist on using all three names (they are serial killers).
Times with mariachi music and no money are better than times with money and no mariachi music.
If you're 30 or so and you have to go outside your tribe for stuff-you need better friends.
BBQ is sacred and best enjoyed on Sunday afternoons.
Do on to others as you would have them do onto you. Unless there's a better than good chance you'll never see them again.
When deciding to either join a dating site or a porn site-go with the porn...you'll be much happier.


On this day:

Ludacris managed to make a song/video that didn't annoy the fuck outta me.
I got this from Michiko via Friendster:

Kento and Michiko have finally finished the new IQU record. We would like to thank all of you for your support and patience! For any of you who are curious to hear what we have been working on for the past couple of years, we will be having a preview listening party of the pre mastered CD.

Wed Sept 17, 7:30pm
at the Baltic Room
(1207 Pine Street on Capitol HIll)

The CD will start at 7:45pm sharp so be on time!
Snacks will be provided as well as happy hour prices at the bar.
And of course, this event is free.
Please feel free to bring your friends.

Wow, I thought those two had thrown in the towel! I'll have to hit the hay early so's I can check it out. See you there!


So my friends James and Carmel are off for trip around Europe and probably a few other places. They won't be back until after the new year so we all went down to Barca on Friday to wish them a "Bon Voyage". They'll be posting to a weblog-I'll link to it as soon as I remember what it's called! (Ah! Here it is! - Ed.)
I hadn't been to Barca in quite awhile, but Richard-one of the owners-saw me and was kind enough to buy me a drink.
James' neighbor, who I met her at a White Elephant party at James and Carmels' place a couple of years ago came and sat with me, which cause me some distress as a) I didn't remember meeting her and b) talking to anyone (especially cute girls) more than 10 years younger than me only serves to remind me that I am not actually 19 anymore. I think El Stu and Scott delighted in watching me squirm as I made nice...bastards.
Megan and her former roommage Emily also joined us AND I got to see Adumb and Erin for the first time in months! And lovely, lovely Annie and her fella Ethan were also in the house, so I guess it was sort of a reunion.

The next day, Frito and I DJ'd my friend Tom's wedding reception. We brought a dual CD player (borrowed from Dan The Man), Frito's iPod and laptop. I met Tom many, many moons ago when he was still in college. I knew his older brother Mike through my roommate who worked with him briefly. Man, out of that whole crowd, Oani is the only one I see regularly
the rest are all hitched and have houses and children...
Frito and I managed a good set. I've DJ'd 4 or 5 weddings and I usually tell the couple that I'm not a professional and that I don't buy music I can hear any on the radio. Usually they don't have a problem with that...it's the friends who don't know me and assume I was hired. As usual there's the one person who gets bent out of shape when you don't have "How Deep Is Your Love" by the Bee Gees, but what can you do? I'm not going haul every CD I own on the off chance someone requests "Yellow River" as covered by Elton John. Jeezus. I deliberately turned down offers of payment partly 'cause Tom and Katie are nice kids, but mostly because it would give me the freedom NOT to play fucking Abba! We placed a notepad for requests mostly out of courtesy.
So, if sometime in the future you see me behind the decks at your friend's wedding reception, here are some handy tips to insure we get along fine:

1) A request is just that. A request. If you're upset with me for not having THAT SONG, fuckin' get over it. I may be able to find something similar or at least by the same band...but if I ain't got it, I ain't got it. Only the couple carry any weight with me (and even then, it's not that much), so there.
2) The more specific you are in your request, the better chance you'll have of hearing something your dancing like a chickin with it's head cut off no rhythm havin ass can flail to. DO NOT come up to me and ask me to play "something you can dance to", chances are, I already am and you're just fuckin' lame.
3) Keep your hands off my stuff. I wouldn't go rooting through your medicine cabinet, you stay out of my CD's.
4) I want to have some fun too. That means you may not hear all of the 20 disco tunes you've heard at every wedding you've been to this summer. You can go to PolyEsther's (or whatever it's called now) or listen to KJR or your "NOW THAT'S DISCO!" compilations anytime. Chances are you're feeling nostalga for something you weren't even there for the first time...and there was some damn fine stuff that doesn't get played. I'm sick of it, the waitstaff is sick of it.
Actually, Frito and I got props from the staff for that very reason! And we ended our set with "Standing on the Verge of Gettin' it On-I dare you to tell me that song ain't the shit!

If I sound arrogant, oh well. But believe me-if you have some drinks, feel the bass and free your mind-you WILL have a good time...


I read Cheney's statements from his interview on today on "Meet the Press" and I gotta ask: How long are we going to put up with the lies from these sacks of shit?!
I have had coversations with Matt about this and while we do agree that Saddam being out of power is a good thing, it's like finding expensive meat in a shit sandwich. We're now starting to understand just how expensive that meat is going to be...


[Posted Wednesday, September 10th, 2003 02:30:00 Pitchfork Central Time]

John L. Ferrer and Will Bryant report:
There's that rare time when a sarcastic, jaded music news site has to report
without any sarcasm or irony. Short of the Velvet Underground, there's no
band more beloved, more important, more cited as an influence in indie rock
than the Pixies. Whether you're strictly a Doolittle man (surely one of the
finest damn rock albums ever) or an obsessive who can name every Trompe le
Monde b-side, the Pixies' contributions to the alternative rock canon are
sacred texts, the alpha cell of a paisley-flecked v23 flowchart that, down
various impeccably typeset branches, might lead to Nirvana, to the Breeders,
to Throwing Muses, Guided By Voices, Modest Mouse, Trail of Dead, or Enon.

Sadly, most of these revelations weren't made until after the band's prime.
Since their reportedly messy and bloody demise in 1993, fans have signed on
by the dozens-- based partially on the recommendation of Kurt Cobain, and
partially by their desire to find something truly exuberant, legitimate,
funny and weird in their music. Anyone born in the '80s might surely have at
some point sighed and abandoned all hope of seeing the Pixies on stage at
all. In a sense, the idea of a Pixies reunion has almost become a joke, the
indie-kid version of "Yeah, when pigs fly." So when the report came in July
that all four original members (that's Black Francis, Kim Deal, David
Lovering, and Joey Santiago) have been secretly practicing together every
couple of blue moons since the breakup, there was the first glimmer of hope.

Now that the heavyhandedness is past, here comes the point. The glimmer is
now a full-blown supernova. It's happening. In April. No dates yet, not even
any quotes from the group's principals-- just a band spokesperson's promise
to MTV, who broke the story. The source, who remains unnamed in MTV's story,
also claims that if all goes well a studio album will follow.

The Pixies. Are back. Together. Music is saved. Lovers of rock, unite and
cheer. This is going to truly own.
There is nothing sadder than finding that your box of Lucky Charms has gone stale...


Sliding into Fascism part 5.
OK...you know what really sick? I talked to Frito before going to work and found out we both had General Tso's chicken for lunch today...


Being (rather lazy) bachelors, we don't cook around here much. Frito (although he makes excellent beer, scones and bread) usually whips up mac and cheese or tortellini when he bothers to cook. I'm a bit more adventurous, with curries and weird rice and/or pasta dishes, but not much moreso. A lot of the time, we wind up and one of the two Chinese restaurants on our street or the Chinese Deli at Safeway.
I'd always wondered about how General Tso's Chicken came about. I imaginged something like this...

Scene: Ancient China, , dusk-some hours after a huge battle. The camera pans across fields of dead bodies. In the distance we see the white tents with flags and banners fluttering in the cold wind.

The camera slowly zooms in, there in the center of the tents we see a handsome middle-aged Chinese man, dressed in elaborate battle armor. This is General Tso. He is quietly discussing post-battle plans when a young lieutenant rides up on horseback.

General Tso: Lieutenant Chou! Report!

Lieutenant Chou (dismounts): Sir! The area has been secured and what remains of the rebel army have been routed!

General Tso: Excellent! We will camp here for two days and move on. Is there anything else?

Lieutenant Chou: Sir, I must add that I have heard rumors of unrest among the troops...

General Tso: Unrest...? What to do you mean?

Lieutenant Chou: Well, sir...the men are...dissatisfied.

General Tso: Dissatisfied? Dissatisfied with what?!

Lieutenant Chou: The food, sir.

General Tso: The food?!

Lieutenant Chou: Yes, sir. Cheng Li has been serving nothing but fish balls and brocoli for weeks. The men are tired and want something that will revive their spirit! Something different!!

General Tso: Hmm...something...different.

Lieutenant Chou: Yes, sir.

General Tso: (Turns away from Chou and muses to himself) Everyone knows an army fights on its stomach...and despite our victory today, there is still much to do! Cook Li has been with me for many years but I am reminded of this tale...


Cook Ting was cutting up an ox for Lord Wen‑hui. At every touch of his hand, every heave of his shoulder, every move of his feet, every thrust of his knee ‑ zip! zoop! He slithered the knife along with a zing, and all was in perfect rhythm, as though he were performing the dance of the Mulberry Grove or keeping time to the Ching‑shou music.

"Ah, this is marvelous!" said Lord Wen‑hui. "Imagine skill reaching such heights!"

Cook Ting laid down his knife and replied, "What I care about is the Way, which goes beyond skill. When I first began cutting up oxen, all I could see was the ox itself. After three years I no longer saw the whole ox. And now ‑ now I go at it by spirit and don't look with my eyes. Perception and understanding have come to a stop and spirit moves where it wants. I go along with the natural makeup, strike in the big hollows, guide the knife through the big openings, and follow things as they are. So I never touch the smallest ligament or tendon, much less a main joint.

"A good cook changes his knife once a year‑because he cuts. A mediocre cook changes his knife once a month‑because he hacks. I've had this knife of mine for nineteen years and I've cut up thousands of oxen with it, and yet the blade is as good as though it had just come from the grindstone. There are spaces between the joints, and the blade of the knife has really no thickness. If you insert what has no thickness into such spaces, then there's plenty of room; more than enough for the blade to play about it. That's why after nineteen years the blade of my knife is still as good as when it first came from the grindstone.

"However, whenever I come to a complicated place, I size up the difficulties, tell myself to watch out and be careful, keep my eyes on what I'm doing, work very slowly, and move the knife with the greatest subtlety, until ‑ flop! the whole thing comes apart like a clod of earth crumbling to the ground. I stand there holding the knife and look all around me, completely satisfied and reluctant to move on, and then I wipe off the knife and put it away."

"Excellent!" said Lord Wen‑hui. "I have heard the words of Cook Ting and learned how to care for life!"

General Tso (turning back to Lieutenant Chou): Lieutenant! Do we have any oxen?

Lieutenant Chou: Uh...no, sir. But we do have 1,500 chickens!

General Tso: Then we will use chicken! Stand aside Lieutenant-I have some work to do!

Unfortunately, the reality is not nearly as cool. (via Metafilter)

Hm...I'm hungry.

I just retook the Keirsey Personality Test ('cause George did and I totally bit his style) and came out a Fieldmarshal. Interesting...I become more introverted over the last few years.
I'll have to take it again in a couple of years and see what comes up!


A Retraction

We here at Statanic Action! try to provide thoughts and opinions based on accurate information, keeping firmly in mind that "reality is based on perception", salting it with a rilly big grain o' and peppering it with a little "So there!". However, after receiving the following email from El Frito:

Not that I want to stand up for paul allen at all, but he no longer owns ticketmaster. I guess he used to own a 47.5% stake in it, which he sold to the Home Shopping Network a while back.

We would like to retract Ticketmaster's fucked-up scheme to screw over music fans as more proof that Paul Allen is fuckin' EVIL. We would also like to encourage you to keep checking back-I'm sure Mr. Allen will do something to offer more proof that he is fuckin' EVIL in the very near future.

Tenk yew!

In other news: Today is Laurie B.'s birthday, which we will celebrate by doing a little bowling (or not) and drinking (defo!) up at the Garage tonight.


OK. I'm all up in the Friendster thing. It's like the six degrees of separation we've been hearing about for years...except you need to get your ass on there. I'm under "Stacius". I've actually met a really cool new friend via Friendster. And it's alway interesting finding out who considers you a friend. And the nice things we say about one another! Try it!


More proof that Paul Allen is fuckin' EVIL.


Labor Day Weekend 2003:

Friday - Went to the Baltic Room for happy hour, then Neil, Laurie, Scott, Cindy and I headed out to The Triangle Tavern to meet Megan and her friends Cat and Allory. We drank lots 'o beer and traded many stories. A good night was had by all.

Saturday - Rolled out of the rack, comtemplated going to Bumbershoot but decided to head down the Queen Anne Easy Street Records to catch sets my Downpilot and Marc Olson. Returned to 'stead, slept a bit then went to Chop Suey for "Buttrock Karaoke" which was put on by the Three Imaginary Girls. Scott and Neil were also in the house-which was packed! The idea was to have members of various bands (and brave hoi polloi) get up and sing various buttrock/hair metal 'classics'. It was kinda weird seeing supposed 'hipsters' belting out "Wanted: Dead or Alive" with something bordering on real passion. The event was supposed to raise money for an independent film called "Unsung" about...making a karaoke video. (How Meta!)

Sunday - Again comtemplated going to Bumbershoot, decided not to. Frito and I went out to Southcenter for burgers at Red Robin and to run a few errands.
We'd heard that De La Soul was coming up to the Baltic Room after their "Hip-Hop 101" gig at Bumbershoot so I met Neil there and we grabbed a prime spot.
We were joined by Mickey, Sky, Suze, Maria, Laurie, Scott, Michael, Elizabeth, Tess and Aaron. PA MASE put on a clinic, spinning prime cuts from the last 20+ years of hip hop to a packed and dancing house!

Monday - Megan mentioned she had to move, because her building was being remodeled. So Neil and I, being the righteous dudes we are, volunteered to help. We were done in under 3 hours and spent the rest of the evening eating Thai food and cracking each other up with (rather gross) stories.
I met more of Megan's friends, Amy and Nate. Allory was in the house as well.

It's back to work tonight but it's a three day week! WhooHoo!



Matt once told me that his brother used to have a roommate who only ate candy and meat. I thought that was so cool, but I couldn't tell you why.
Anyway, I'm at the beginning of a long weekend. Bumbershoot 2003 is in effect and I may go down there Saturday. Depends on the size of my hangover.
Right now I'm sleepy and but wound up. Cindy is in town visiting Scott and it's alway nice to have a female in tha hizzy. I bought some new reading material, I picked up "White Crow" by Mary Gentle after reading about her at China Mieville's site.

Man, Beyonce is so focking beautiful...


The Sun|Tzu Sound System got a nice write-up in the this week's Stranger. If you like to dance, nay, if you like music at all-get off yr lame asses and come to a show and support these guys! I'm sick of people acting like they're clueless! You wanna fucking clue?! Here it is!


Went to Lollapalooza 2003 on Saturday in Frito's shiny new blue and white Mini Cooper S. That thing has more gizmos than James Bond! I normally don't go to huge shows, because I believe you should be within spitting distance of the performer. But Frito got free (Free!) tickets and what better way to break in the car than a road trip to Enumclaw?!
We got to 'palooza in time for The Donnas, but still missed them because we were in line for $7 beers(!).
However, did manage to catch:

Jurassic 5 - A tight, clean set. Nice.
A Perfect Circle - I'm not a big TOOL fan, but they were pretty good. Maynard wore a long wig for most of the set.
Incubus - I hate these fuckers. Seriously. So I bailed and walked around the grounds and played some Xbox.
Audioslave - I'd dismissed them as a dumbed down Soundgarden but man, they put on a good show! They played covers by Funkadelic, Elvis Costello and the White Stripes too.
Jane's Addiction - eh. Perry gets oan mah tits. We stayed for 5 songs and then bailed.
I was disappointed I didn't get to see Queens of the Stone Age. That would've made my fookin' year! I guess they got tired of blowing everyone else off the stage every night, heh.
Oh, I saw James Iha on the grounds after A Perfect Circle's set. He's a tiny fucker.

I bought some new discs this weekend too.

Mclusky rules! Bow to your new Welsh masters.
TV on the Radio impress me more with each listen.
Rilo Kiley are awesome. I missed them when they came to town in July. Damn!

I'll have to listen to The Party of Helicopters and get back to yaze.

That is all.


Good Grief! Do these people have no shame?!


Robert Plant
Thru With The Two Step

Dance by me close Tell 'em, all to go
Once for the money But I'm, through with the show
An' move with me gently, Oh so slow
Hold me and maybe, oh, We'll never let go
Never let go
I'm through with sneakin' Been cutting it close
Through with the two-step, Oh Where the rhythm is lost
Through with the two-step Where the rhythm is lost
Oh, yes, it's love in any key
You opened up the door Now I know, it's got to be
Now my cards on the table, Hands on the deck [Hands opened up]
Now "A" is for able, All words spoken right [Oh, pause for breath]
My willing baby, now can't you see Little girl, it's not for me.
So you waltzed into my life, One two three
Warmth of your smile Oh, let it please be me,
Please let it be me You switch and swirl,
Oh, swing and sway
Stay till the sun comes, and, don't go away
Stay till the sun comes, and, don't go away
Stay till the sun comes, and, don't go away
Don't go away, don't go away, aah
It might be cozy baby, please don't go now
And it's buy me, don't buy me baby, baby
Please don't go, oh
Oh, don't go away now baby
And it's bye, me, baby now please don't go away
And it's bye, now baby, baby
Baby, please don't go

I don't know why this popped into my head, but for a short while after high school, this was our song. We'd sit in Derek's room in the basement and blast it on his stereo, singing along. Sometimes Steve and I would turn off the lights and hold up a lighter.


The N-word. Dong Resin breaks it down. I agree wholeheartedly.
My father passed away on this day some 13 years ago. We weren't close. I didn't understand him until it was much too late and I don't think he'd ever get me. But that's cool. I'd gotten to see him before he passed, my sister and I drove for three days straight after getting a message from his wife saying, "Your father just went into the hospital. I don't think he's coming out again, so if you plan to come down here you better do it now." Heidi and I got our shit together and hit the road, living on Doritos and Mountain Dew. I did most of the driving, fighting off sleep and listening to crappy Top 40 radio the whole way.
I don't think I've listened to Mariah Carey's "Vision of Love" since.

Anyway, it was shortly after we arrived that I realized how much I hate hospitals. The staff was kind, but their sad smiles told me everything I needed to know. My dad could have all the morphine he wanted by that time. Needless to say he wasn't much for conversation. After 3-4 visits I wanted to leave for home but my sister talked me into staying a couple of days longer. He'd asked to hear my band on one visit. I handed over my Walkman..."Wow," he said. "This is pretty good!" He encouraged me to go to Art School, which pissed me off because he'd always discouraged that ambition when I was a teenager, telling me to get a "Real job-something with computers" instead.
I remember sitting in a chair next to his bed wondering how someone who was so dynamic, fit and alive (he'd been a Seattle firefighter for 12 years) could be turned into a dry, grey husk in such a short time. The chemo had made his skin dark and blotchy. I'll never forget now bright the whites of his eyes seemed or how he seemed to weigh next to nothing when I hugged him goodbye for the last time.

I got angry somewhere around Knoxville, probably more angry than I've ever been in my life. It all seemed so unfair. I'd been looking forward to the day when he and I could have our big falling out, then reconcile, with him finally accepting me as my own man. My own person. I felt cheated and that his fate was unjust. Despite our differences, he'd always been generous with everyone, friends, family-he'd talk to anyone. And in the end, he was back there in a hospital bed, hopped up on opiates and waiting the clock to run out.
I was a zombie by the time I got home, I don't even remember much of the drive, except for hitting pigeon somewhere in eastern Washington. My girlfriend at the time was anxiously waiting for me at my apartment. She'd stolen one of my pillows just so she could sleep. I never got it back.
The next day, I got another phone call.

He wasn't alone when he went. He was surrounded by family. Ellen said he "Just wound down-like a clock." I put in a half-day at work, then I had to buy a suit and head for the airport.
I'd known the day was coming for close to two years, I'd processed it and could deal. Funerals are weird anyway. I pretty much tuned out and kept to myself. I don't remember the funeral. But I do remember my sister, stepsister, stepmother and little brother all hugging each other and crying as they lowered the casket into the ground. Even after the ceremony was over, my uncle Sonny and I watched as the groundskeepers filled in the grave and tamped down the dirt. We didn't leave until they were almost done. Of course, I had no way of knowing that I'd be back at that same site 9 years later to bury my stepmother.

I wish I had something profound to say, or that there was some sort of lesson to be learned from it. I do think about my 'Old Man' almost daily and wonder what life would be like had he not gotten sick. Whatever pain there was has faded into memory, like when I cracked my ankle when I was 12.

If you're lucky enough to still have both yr parents, do let them know you love them.



The weekend ended much too soon but before it did, a bunch of us went out on Saturday night. Tracy, Kira, Scott and I ventured to The Eastlake Zoo, a crusty dive bar for Scott's buddy Garrett. I only knew a couple of the Amazonian's there so we mostly kept to ourselves.
Later on we headed down to The Lux on 2nd Avenue to buy Trip a drink for his 32nd. Neil showed up and we downed quite a few beers. I was playing matchmaker, Kira kinda looks like Wynona Ryder with a Cleopatra haircut and she's pretty cool. They seemed to hit it off...my work is done. Still later we came back to the 'stead and drank some more, finally going to bed around 4am.
I had to be at Sean's to record at 1, only to find out he'd been called into work after Matt and I had gotten there. It was a gorgeous day out, so Matt and I walked over to The Cantebury and played some pool. I took the long route home, enjoying the cool air flowing over me and the warm sunshine. I felt really alive for the first time in a long while!
The kitchen remodel is coming along and the back yard is finished. Hopefully, the flooring cabinets, sink and whatnot will be in by the end of the month. I'm tired of eating out all the time. We're going to have to clean the entire house to get rid of all the dust and debris but I think it'll be worth it.

BTW-I'd like to thank everyone for the birthday gifts, cards, drinks, wishes and flowers. Stu got me a DVD of "Raising Arizona" and a book on Marc Chagall. Neil a copy of "The Golden Bough" and Laura got me a book of poems illustrated by William Blake. The most "literary" birthday yet!

Additionally, I'd like to congradulate the Sun|Tzu crew on their successful tour of sunny California and pass along some positive vibes to El Stu, whose grandmother passed away last week.


It was one of the nicest breakups I've ever had.
After much thinking about our situation, I found that I wasn't completely happy with the way things were going...and neither was she. We live in different cities. We have different approaches and goals in life and trying to mesh the two seemed an insurmountable problem. My work schedule made it almost impossible to get together during the week.
We got together to talk yesterday and had a really nice time. Strange, when we both knew we were ending the relationship. Sheri made a really nice pasta dinner and we watched "Raising Arizona" on DVD (thanks, Stu!). We got up in the morning made breakfast and said our goodbyes. I am going to work hard to maintain a friendship-we both want it, so that should be easy.

What's next? Hm...


I'm gonna be 36 day after tomorrow. I thought I'd have it together by 35, but HA! The gods mock me yet again. But I ain't mad about it. If anything, I have learned a thing or two...now what to do with that know-ledge. I know I need a serious vacation. And you know what I think would make me happy? Three days in a sensory-deprevation chamber with a quart of mushroom tea...
ANYWAY. I have nothing profound to say. Life goes on, I love all of yaze and if you're inclined to pray for me (or at least send me some good energy) I hope that I can use it to have the courage to change what can, accept what I cannot and have the wisdom to discern between to two...

Orf tae bed.

(Amazon wish list-quit buggin' me! ; -))


This caused me to chuckle mightily...


I'm whupped. My plan worked, unfortunately I woke up with a slight headache. I had to get together and ride out to Fremont to meet Tom and his intended to discuss music for their wedding next month. I don't know why I volunteer for these things-it usually turns out to be a huge hassle. But Frito does it too, so I guess we suffer from the same sort of masochism/mental illness.
Frito left for an out of state bachelor party and took Whiskey over to Marney and Kristen's so (right now, anyway) I gots the place to myself. I plan to do these three things:

1. Eat a bowl of lucky charms.

2. Read a bit.

3. Sleep as long as I can.

Hopefully, I will arise somewhat bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. There's some all-night event at work tonight. They've been hyping it for a couple of weeks, although I don't really understand why. Apparently, the sales dept. is planning to call all of our biggest customers to let them know they're available 24-7.
I'm like duh-don't they know that already? It's why I live my nocturnal existance right now! I do look forward to meeting some coworkers I never seen before...hopefully some of them are cute!

It seems like everyone I know is in some state of transition right now. I've been kinda surly and feel the need to start some shit...we'll see where that goes.